Perhaps a better title to this posting would be ‘evolution’…simply because that is what we do as human beings in everything we do. I like it as a word too because there is an element of optimal change and growth associated with it. In life it becomes all too easy to look at the transitions we go through and see them as ‘failures’….resulting in beating ourselves up…not once stopping to consider that something far greater is about to unfold.
And wonderful things HAVE unfolded from the transitions of my leather life recently..hence the revamping of my site.
The first transition was my departure from the city of Toronto…and my involvement in the community there. It was an incredible 7 years that I lived in TO, and I owe a great deal of my growth and maturing to the leatherfolk there. But ultimately, the city was not my home, and I reached a point where it was time to move back to the US and feel a sense of grounding. I have no regrets for the time spent in Canada, and I am grateful for the lifelong friends I have there. But as an American, I needed to be back to what I knew.
I am also no longer a collared boy. Many of you are familiar with my podcast with Sir Machias, where I shared openly about my need to “balance” by engaging in subspace with the man responsible for getting me there. We had an incredible connection and some pretty amazing play. And eventually, we realized our paths were going in different directions. It was a tough transition for both of us and certainly very painful. But ultimately, he had to release me. I learned a tremendous amount from my time with him, and I still wear his permanent marking with great pride.
I later wore the collar of a gentleman named WhipMaster Bob for a year. He is someone I have known from teaching at various events all over the US and Canada, and I embraced the opportunity to wear his collar and grow even further. WMB is someone who among other things, fulfills a kind of paternal role for me…something that I have yearned for in my development. I also needed the “marine” disciplinary approach he has with life. This too came to an end recently…though the reason is not a negative one….
Just when I had decided that a relationship was not something I needed or wanted…when I firmly believed that I was simply going to be a single leatherman with my boys that would come over and play on the weekend…HE came along. And in a nuclear way. I never thought that I would be able to find a partner that had all the kinky qualities I enjoy, but also loves and embraces who I am under all the “Dart Inc” and holds me in the highest regard. But,I found such a man. His name is Bart (yes I know…Dart n Bart…we can’t make this stuff up!)..and not only is he my collared boy…on Sept 1 he also became my husband. It has been an incredible ride, and I am ever thankful to the Universe that they put him in my life. WhipMaster Bob and I had decided it was time for me to concentrate on simply being a couple…and I have never been happier 🙂
So here’s to change and evolution..and the launch of the new site!